再多的[道歉]，也没用！

我发现，我们之间什么都不多~
最多的就是[对不起]~
虽然每次都说不可以说[对不起]~
但每当做错什么事，第一句话就是[SORRY]~
而我们，也习惯了~
不是吗？

今天，我真的觉得自己问题很重~
怎么可以一直觉得你没用呢？
怎么可以一直在朋友面前说你KASHU呢？
其实，最没用的是我吧~
最KASHU 的也是我吧~
因为，我就连怎样去保护一个男友也不会~
这不是叫[卡输]吗？

看着你不开心离开了我座位~
我知道我伤害了你~
我一直道歉，希望你会接受~
我也答应你，我一定不会再那样说你了~
我知错了！！
对不起~对不起~
你会原谅我吗？

我们的未来，我们面对吧~

今晚，得到了一个消息~
班上的一位朋友，因为得了师训~
即将要离开我们了~
即将要离开班上了~
相处了一年，到如今还是要离开了~
我知道我们不能阻止，因为这是你的未来~
我们也只能祝福~
祝福你一切美好！！

就这样，我和现在的他谈起了这件事情~
原来我们之间出现的只是[害怕]和[恐惧]的感觉~
你说你害怕我以后会跟那位班上朋友一样~
你说你怕我们以后不同大学~
你说你觉得[距离]是一种问题~
同样的，我也觉得[距离]是一种问题~
我们都输给了[距离]~

我们的未来，难道就只能靠上天安排吗？
我要我们的未来，是我们自己去创造~
对，你说你怕以后不同大学~
那同样的我，也是会害怕啊~
不是吗？
但，我也希望我们能现在努力点，为自己的未来创出一片天空~
这也是我们唯一能做的事情~

今晚，我能感觉出你的害怕~
另一件事情的发生，让我觉得你对我还是没那种信任~
也许我们还不是那么稳定吧~
这样的感觉才会发生~
而我也安慰了你~我很清楚现在的自己~
我不会回到过去了~
因为，我回不去了~
请你一定要相信我，好吗？

是我带给你不快乐，所以我决定有权利让你开心回~
我知道你不要我难过，才撒谎骗我说你不难过了~
可是，我不是东西，我是人~我是有感觉的~
我能感觉你的害怕和不快乐~
对不起~~对不起~~

就让时间来证明这一切吧~
就让我们一起面对这一切吧~

break away STRESS~

Finally,exam is passed~
and no more revision for temporarily~
no need do last minute revision~
and the most important is~
NO MORE STRESS now~

mid year exam~
the questions for each paper was tough~
and what i worry now is about my result~
i should be ready to get the bad result for my mid year exam~

**********************************************************
这几天，我开朗了~
就连朋友都说我总是春风满面~
也许，是某人让我开心吧！！
但，最大的因素也应该是我看开了吧~
人总是要往前看，不是吗？
过去的，我不能改变什么~
但，未来，至少我还可以靠自己力量去创造~
我要让自己在未来的日子里，都是那么开心~

虽然人生总是会有不愉快的事情发生~
虽然人生总是会有意想不到的事情发生~
可是，接受那些事情，也许可以带给我们不一样的结果~
从前，我总是埋怨事情的发生~
很不明白为什么这一切会发生在我身上~
也许是我个人因素~
我承认我不是最好的人~
我太敏感，我太在乎，我太看不开了~
所以才会引来那些让自己不悦的心情~

我总是觉得身边的人都讨厌我~
我总是觉得身边的人都在说我~
但，事实上，却不是那样~~
这一切，都是我的敏感作祟吧~~

但，自从朋友告诉了我~
不必去在意人怎样看你~
不必去在意人的眼神~
我慢慢改变了~
对，没错~
不用去在乎，因为我是我~
我想做什么就做什么~
最重要，我对得起自己就好啦~~

***************************************************************

HAPPY + CARELESS

15/05/2011~
今天，从8点考试到11点~
又加上4个小时的睡眠~
考完试后，整个人都觉得很困很困~

今天的我，是否显得特别的安静呢？
也不懂为什么，就是不想说话~
也不想融入朋友的话题~
就是喜欢一个人坐在那边看着朋友赌博，谈天而已~
也许自己需要冷静~但，冷静什么我不知道~

今天，有个朋友突然告诉我~
不要太去在乎人的眼神~
因为人的眼神太多种了，我怎么能去在乎完呢~
也许吧~不过我会尽力让自己不去在乎这一切~
谢谢你这位朋友~经常在我的部落留言~
给予一些安慰的话~

*****************************************************
BABY SING's feeling :
BABY SING,why you will so careless when exam??
PP1 paper make me low confidence~
the mid year exam make me realize that want to achieve my target is the most hardness thing~
all follow STPM format~
15 marks was gone~and me getting moodless and moodless when thinking back about it~
sometime i will think that:what for i STUDY SO HARD??
the reality i cant change anymore~just have to accept it~
as my mum told my last nite,we must face our reality!!because all these thing wont change anymore~
and the last way is to accept it^^

EXAM,make me sad and sad now~
i'm afraid with examinations now~
mid year exam just leave 2 days only~
and PP2 and MARCO  are the next paper that i want to face it^^
just keep on telling myself:STUDY + TRY MY BEST!!
just hope that my result wont drop anymore in these exam!!

whether can achieve my target or not,i need to face it!!
I NEED TO ACCEPT IT~

it wont CHANGE~

the decision that i make~
it will be UNCHANGE~
********************************************
especially for a BOY:
今天跟姐妹谈了很多~
觉得自己开心了很多~
不要觉得你不能给我快乐~
因为，很多事情都因我而变得不快乐~
所以，你常对我说的“对不起”~
其实，是我应该对你说的~
对不起，总是让你变得不开心~


我也知道自己其实不是很了解你~
我知道接受你不是因为同情心泛滥~
而是，我真的接受你~
我真的很想尝试去了解你~
了解你的一切~
了解你的喜欢和不喜欢~
了解你的周围~
但，我知道这一切，都需要时间~对吗？
就给我们彼此一些时间吧~


自从我们关系改变后~
我总觉得自己总是带给你很多的不快乐~
我也觉得自己总是逼你做着你不喜欢的东西~
我真的很不了解你的感受~
我只是做我要你做的东西~
对不起，让你觉得压力了~


今天，在班和你沟通后~
心情确实好很多~
我能感受到你的不开心~
我能看到你的眼泪~
这一切，我都感受到了~
我觉得自己太没有用了~


我还是那么失败~
面对爱情，我总是不知所措~
我不知道该怎么去处理这些事情~
请你要原谅我的这一切~


对于我做出的决定~
既然我接受了，我就不想放弃~
这一切，我相信不会影响我们之间的感情~
****************************************************

UNstable~

longtime din update my blog~
so sorry about it~
baby sing now is facing mid year exam~
and less and less on9 now~
my blog followers,so sorry~

*******************************************
this week,my skul is starting mid year exam~
and i was work hard for this time exam~
just feel a bit upset about the exam questions~
more and more standard~
make me anxious about my in coming STPM~
BUT,i try my best to do it!!!

********************************************
觉得自己太没用了~
我太在乎，太在意，太敏感了~
身边的一切，我一定要去理会~
包括朋友的眼神和举动~
你们的一举一动，可以影响我的心情~

今天，我很不开心~
我找了我的姐妹诉苦~
姐妹也告诉了我很多东西~
你们的安慰，对我来说多么地有用~

自己心里越来越不能平衡了~
一点点小事就敏感~
我~到底怎么了？
当初的我~到了哪里？
我快发疯了~

也许，自己不应该顾虑太多的东西~
就如我的好友告诉我：只要自己觉得能过自己那关，人家怎样看我们都无所谓~
我会尝试开心，看开的~
我需要快乐！！

stressful NIGHT~

12.48am now~
and i'm sitting in front of laptop~
on9 non stop~
listening song non stop~
singing non stop~

in other side,open PP books and start write something~
pick some notes from refrence book~
and remember and study by hard~
in order to face the test on tomorrow~
although it's just a small test for us,but i still study hard~
MAYBE,it's very important for me~
if not,why i will do it?

next week~my life will be busy~
mid year exam will start on next week~
and getting stress now~
nervous!!!!!
just keep on telling myself : JUST DO IT!!TRY UR BEST!!
this is the only way that i can consoled myself~

in class~still relax~
still can gambling non stop at class~
i think that i'm addicted by gambling~
i should control myself~
but,gambling once a time,is quiet ok la~
can be the way to release my stress~
this is the only entertainment in my class~~

next week is coming soon~
mid year exm is coming soon~
the time flies very fast~
not enough for me to study~
I WANT ENJOY MY LIFE!!

BUT,now should not enjoy my life too much~
am important exam still waiting me~
let me fight with the exam until DECEMBER~
then i will enjoy my life very much~~~

BABY SING,add oil^^

ACHIEVE target~

i just passed my april test in april month~
the results and position in class was out~
all of these was out of my expected~
i'm getting first place in my class~
BUT,i just felt normal actually~
should i be happy because of my result?
MAYBE YES!
but what i worry is about my mid year exam~
i'm scare that my result will drop in the mid year exam~
so,i STUDY BY HARD in order to get the better result~
3.75~april test NGMP~
although i'm achieve my target,but,i just felt unsatified with it~
maybe it's just a test,not STPM!!

STUDY by hard to prove that i also can get excellent result~
STUDY by hard to prove that i still can concentrate in my studies although facing some problem~
i'm set the target for me in these exam:3.80~
will it achieve again?
I HOPE so!!
BABY SING,add oil^^

这几天，我~笑了！

好不容易，自己渐渐开心起来了~
时间，让我想通了很多东西~
时间，让我知道什么叫改变~
时间，也让我笑了~
我回来了！

觉得自己最近很幸福~
身边不再有怪怪的眼神了~
而我们，变得轻松了很多~
不需要再去在乎人的眼神~
不需要再去在乎人的闲言闲语~
因为，再也没有人那样对待我们了~


我们回到了以前~
那围在一起谈天的日子~


我笑了~是因为心中的问题解决了~
我笑了~是因为自己还是没有被朋友冷落~
我笑了~是因为我觉得自己很幸福~
谢谢你们~让我笑了！！

希望这幸福是长久而不是短暂的！
因为，我知道，我很需要那个笑容~
我需要那个笑容来过着我现在的生活~
我需要那个笑容来让我身边的朋友们开心~

The most important thing~
EMO SING is disappear~
just hope that BABY SING can always happy and smile forever~
I LOVE OMEGA~~

回到当初的咱们~

昨天，老师全部没有进班~
而我们呢，总是谈天过日子~
想读书，可以却不能进脑~
也许，班上太热闹了！！

班长星期6的生日，我们却没有帮他庆祝什么~
只是，我们买了礼物送他~
希望他不会介意哦~

好友突然问起了：男生的生日礼物到底要买什么？
而我回答了他~
就这样，我们话题开始了~
我们回到了从前的我们~
我们回到两年前的我们~
我们回到恋爱的时候~

我们谈到了AA计~
好友说她以前总是AA 计，不管再怎样便宜的东西~
她总是AA计~因为她不想欠下任何东西！！
而我也觉得从前的我是那样~
可是，仔细想想，总觉得我还是欠了从前的“他”~
从前的“他”买了很多糖果给我~
这是算“欠”吗？
我想了很久！！

我们谈了很多很多的东西~
也问了很多的“假设”~
但，此时此刻，我很清楚自己已经放下了~
彻彻底底地放下了~
虽然偶尔的想念依然存在，但那只是怀念一个朋友的感觉~

********************************************************
BABY SING's feeling:
我不想做比较！
因为感觉没了，比较来比较去也没有什么东西了~
你是你，他是他~
不需要比较啊~
我在乎，我关心，也许因为我爱了~
我不想放弃了！！
因为这是我要的东西~

wish ME: HAPPY LABOUR DAY&HAPPY HOLIDAY!!

first of MAY~
today~LABOUR DAY~
and also SCHOOL HOLIDAY~
but,my life passed MEANINGFULLY~

evening~going SHOPPING with my family~
my mission:BUY HIGH HEEL SHOES~
but the mission was failed~
i just realize that shoes shop at ALOR STAR really a few~
and the shoes cannot attract my attention~
so,i'm failed to buy shoes~
but is OKAY~
what i have is TIME~

enjoyed my lunch in food court at CITY PLAZA~
my stomach full of TOMYAM~
Yummy~Yummy~
I LIKE it^^

*******************************************************
especially for MY FRIEND:
不是所有人可以顾及爱情与友谊~
可能，她以为你可以体谅她为什么那么做~
在班的她~为了陪他，丢下了你~
让你觉得她对你需下的诺言都是假的~对吗？
也许你应该跟她沟通吧~
告诉她你的不悦~
提醒她曾经为你许过的约定~
也许，她不会再那样对你了呢~

要是需要一个伴在班上陪你谈天~
我们这一群肯定可以陪伴你的~
不需要去到别班~
不需要坐在自己座位当傻婆哦~

你不会是一个人的！！

******************************************************

HAPPY BIRTHDAY,my grandson!!

30 of APRIL~
BABY SING at here wish my friend,classmate,monitor and grandson~
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!SWEET 19 in ur life~

GRANDMA here wish GRANDSON sincerely~
happy birthday~~

STRESSFUL~

the end of APRIL~
the MAY is coming soon~
and it's mean that MID YEAR exam is coming soon~
i'm suffocated by it~

IF i throw away the book~
IF i burn all the book~
IF i steal all the exam paper~
IF i can remember what i study by first time~
i wont be stress!!
BUT,i cant do that~

mid year mid year~
all the thing that i read before~
i forget it clearly!!
which mean that i should start study again and again!!
OMG,my life full of studying only!!

I believe that i can do it very well~
I sure can handle it!!
TARGET mid year exam : 3.80 above!!
whether can achieve or not,i will try my best!!

could us back to last time?

many days,u still bahave toward me~
and i understand,why u will do that for me?
our friendship have been change since thatday and that thing~
and our topic become less and less~
we seem din recognize each other~
maybe,u will think that this is the best way for u to put down the thing~
and i will give you the chance to do so~

everytime,when i sat at corner in the class~
many things that i can viewed from the side~
many friends's style~
many friends's pattern~
i know it^^
same as you~
and you always away from me~
but,it's okay!!
i will forgive what u had done for me!!
i appreciate it sincerely~

and tonite,u send a message for me~
inside the message claimed that u still my friend~
and i become happy and happy~
because not u sms for me,is u still treat me as friend~
thx a lot^^

just hope that we can back to lasttime~
chatting without limit~
suan siao-ing without limit~
will that day coming?
i'm waiting^^

思念远方的她~

自从你离开后~
思念一个人的感觉回来了~
这几天，遇到了一些不开心的事情~
让我很怀念你~
怀念当初我们一起谈心诉苦的时光~
怀念我们躲在我的房间谈东西~


在班上，坐在角落的我~
总是特别容易怀念过去~
不舍得，不开心~
的感觉回来了！！


全部以前的朋友的改变了~
但，却唯独我不变！！
还是原地站着不动！！


我是不是太失败了？
是我不愿改变？
还是在期待什么事呢？

EMO SING is back!!

Emmmm~~
how to explain the thing that had happened in this few day??
SAD?UPSET?

我不喜欢人家作弄我~
我不喜欢在我开心的时候，有人来伤害我~
如果杀人没有罪，我肯定会把那些伤害我的人统统杀死~

你们的作弄，会让你们更开心吗？
你们的笑声，是你们的真心吗？

那天的我，是多么想大声起来痛骂你们~
那天的我，真的很想把你们打死~
那天的我，真的很想摔椅子就走人~
但，我还是忍了下来~
独自走回自己的座位，默默哭泣！
我没用，我懦弱！我承认了~
也许你们的作弄对你们而言，是无所谓！
但，对我来说，是一种伤害！！

好友，很抱歉误会了你~
我承认，我是有点生气你~
因为你是我的好友~
因为你身份特殊~
所以，我不允许你那样对待我~
好友，你知道吗？
我被你的那句话伤到了~
你的那句[都是你啦]让我觉得我到底做错了什么？
你的那句让我心情改变了~
那时眼泪已不停地落下~
只是，你不知道而已！！

班长，我只骂你一个人~
因为，我这一路以来，我以为你是不会那样对我的~
因为，我相信你~
因为，你是我的[孙子]~
可是，你做了我伤心的事，怎么叫我不生气你呢？
请原谅我那天骂你的那句话~
对不起！！

EDMUND~对不起~
让你无缘无故被人作弄了~
让你心情不好，真的不好意思！！
你也告诉了我，不要去在意人家怎样说我们~
但，我做不到！！
我做不到不在乎的样子~
很多事情的发生，让我和你的友谊真的改变了~
我渐渐地不找你聊天~
我渐渐地疏远你~
因为，我害怕班上的闲言闲语~
因为，我害怕好友说的[都是你啦]~
我不想自己再做了什么错事~
对不起，让你难过伤心了！！

我累了~
渐渐地，班上的一切~
让我有种[放弃]的念头~
我想放下~想放弃~
但，我知道，我做不到！！

喜欢，是错的吗？
放弃，对的决定吗？
我开始怀疑了~

不舍得~ + 想开了~

不舍得~的感觉回来了！
好久好久没有那样的感觉了~
我不舍得什么呢？
我不舍得我的好友，我的青梅竹马，我的邻居！
她~还是为了她的未来~到了别位去了！
生活中，从此又少了一个朋友~
她再也不会来家里陪我聊天了~
我们再也不会再我的房间谈心事了~
那种姐妹的日子，渐渐不见了！

今天下午，在你还未去KL前，你又来家里找我了~
很可惜，学校有PING PONG活动~
让我们不能谈到很多~
真的不好意思！！
出门前，那种感觉来了~
涌上心头~我很清楚，我不舍得你!!

7.13PM~现在的你，在去着KL的途中~
祝福你：ALL THE BEST!!
I will MISS you very much~~
my best friend~~

*********************************************************
today,you still behave like that with me~
it's seem that you are less chatting and talking with me~
but,IS OKAY!!
and i was thinking carefully~
nothing can i say if you still continue behave like that with me~
maybe you will think that this is the best way when facing me~
IS OKAY~
i will ACCEPT it~
just hope that,you will chatting with me automatically and our friendship can be continue~
i really tired now,really need a shoulder let me CRY~
but,should be TOUGH,rite?BABY SING,DONT CRY!!


justnow ping pong pratice really make me forget all the sadness things that happen in this few days~
i SMATCH ppl non stop~i LAUGHING non stop~
that time,i really felt that~i'm so relax and free~~
i LOVE that feeling~~
and at the same time,I LOVE PINGPONG too^^

***********************************************************

if ONE DAY i BACK to my PAST !!

start to thinking back about my past~
does a person sholud not always look backward?
does a person should always look forward?
i dunnoe~for me,i always look backward!!

always thinking back about my past~
because it gives me a lot of joyful and unforgetable moments~
a lot of things that happened around me before~
a lot of friends that i had before~
but the time was changing,make we cannot together side by side now~
i just hope that in one day,we will meet each other very soon!!
and i'm waiting the day coming~

always thinking about my past~
i will think a lot of questions~
and the questions mostly contain IF~
"if i din do that,what thing that will happen after that?"
"if i do that,what is tthe consequence?"
"if we still remain the same relationship,do we be happy?"
mostly ppl will say,if got IF inside our life,then our life would not have many sadness things happen~

SATURDAY's feeling~
today,it's seem i have lost a friend~
and i was very upset of it~
our relationship will be change now?
would u chatting with me as a classmate?
I DONT THINK SO!!
and your action have show to me,YOU WONT!!
and i start to understand u,why u will do that~
sudddenly,i felt so tired about this thing~
i need a long rest~
i need a shoulder now~

I WANT BACK TO MY PAST!!

interested tuiton class^^

FRIDAY life~
although it's a holiday for us to rest~
but i dont think so~
because we still have to study,not in school,but at outside~
we still have tuiton need to attend~
but,friday's tuiton class,i like it so much^^

the PP teacher always make a lot of joke with us~
he will teaches us many teory and things that we never know it before~
many things that he told us,it's quiet full of meaningful~

today,the same situation~
he are teaching us how to face interview when we r in future~
there are 7 questions that will be ask in the interview~
1.what is ur prinsip in ur life?
2.what is ur best achievement in ur life?
3.what is ur advantages eksklusif?
4.what is ur disadvantages?
5.how much that ur expected salary?
6.what do you do for the company?
7.how much time u will take to achieve the objectives of the company?

and teacher was asked us what is our prinsip in our life~
at that time,i just realize that i din have any prinsip in my life since 19 years i come to this world~
my prinsip?sleeping?eating?be happy?
I DUNNOE~
maybe,i should think carefully what is my prinsip actually~

besides that,teacher also asking girls why we will always ask our bf some questions~
such as,what the first present that a girl present for a boy?
where the first place that we meet?
what is the name of the movie that we r first time watching?
almost like that  la~
and teacher was curious why the girls will ask the boys such question?
does it wan to show that is it the boy care the girl?
or anything???
YES,MAYBE~
ask this kind of questions is wan to show that whether the boy care the girl or not~
this is my OPINION~

many things that he was teached us~
and i more and more like to attend his tuiton class~

*******************************************************************
RECENTLY,the weather is too hot~
and my friends more and more getting sick and unwell~
including me~
we need to take good care on ourselves~
drinking a lot of water~
and BABY SING at here wish my friends:can be well soon~

*********************************************************************

HAPPY study life in PraU~

THRUSDAY~
and my school life has been same as everyday~
and yesterday night,i'll try to promise myself to be happy~
no matter what had happened today,i will make myself to be happy and SMILE always~
and,i had done it^^

this morning,i'm wake up and prepared for went to school~
my mood getting better and better~
and went to school by happy feeling~

at the same thing~
i like to sat at corner in the class by doing my own homework~
and thinking something that always make myself EMO~
i LOVE that feeling~

during doing my tuiton homework~
capture some foto first!!

                                                              this is BABY SING~
justnow sang a song at class~
and someone-my friend~
he cannot remember the lyric of the song~
and make a lot of fun and joke~
make us laughing non stop on him~
but,i need to thanks for him~
because he is make me happy at that time~
thx a lot,EDMUND!!

today,i was participated the quiz which organised by AIMST university~
the question mostly related to PP1~
actually,is quiet simple~
after half hour,i was finished my paper very fast~
and went back to home~

my car~entered "hospital"~
the most sadness thing~
and luckily not my fault~
if not,i will blamed myself so much^^

emmmm~~~~
11.02pm now~
and it shows that i should be hardworking in my studies~
mid year exam~i FIGHT with YOU~

UNHAPPY change to HAPPY

TUESDAY~
today,my mood can consider in sadness and moodless category~
what i will say it?
i dont know^^
maybe yesterday we were marked our MUET reading paper~
and i just get 21/45 correct~
and i was sad and upset~
i cant understand why i will get such lower marks~
maybe,FATED^^

yesterday evening~
we had our co-curiculum activities until 5pm~
and we just entered the centennial and listen to a talks~
about MMU(mutimedia University)~
but we r not interested at all~
we were decided played BINGO game~
and i just won 3 rounds per 8 rounds~(actually forgot how many rounds)

after that,i backed to my sweet home~
and my father was backed at that time~
and i joined with him went jogging at taman golf~
jogging,really can released my stress~
and run about 3 rounds with my dad~
sweating non stop^^
and my body become more and more warm~
i like that feeling~
felt so free and relax~

after back from jogging~
rest for a while and start doing my homework~
going to bed very early~
and think something~
make my tears dropped non stop~
but luckily after that~
i was asleep~

WEDNESDAY~
wake up and prepared wanna going to skul~
this morning,my mood still in bad condition~
at class still same~
our class become casino~
and we r still very relax~
seem no exam in this year~
and i was tend to sit in a corner of my class to doing my homework and thinking something~
becuz that place no ppl will disturbing me~
i like that place so much,SERIOUSLY^^

after backed from skul~
take a nap!!
and my mood become more and more better~
and i need to thanks for someone who always caring me~
so sorry about that u r influenced by me~
really SORRY^^

17 april 2011^^

again~my SUNDAY's LIFE~
it is just a normal day for me~
going to school and doing nothing~
going to school my friends and chatting non stop(gossip non stop)~
this is BABY SING school life~

evening~
going to PING PONG PRATICE at school~
we are still playing ping pong as playing badminton~
SMATCH non stop~
and i LIKE to SMATCH ppl~
especially,the ppl always SMATCH me~

i was hitted by someone~
and it's too painful~
because he was smatch to my eye~
OMG~my lovely eye~
it's too pain~
opsss~
but i din blamed him,this is just a game~
IS OK!!
no need keep on saying SORRY to me~
and i want to say:I FORGIVE YOU!!

LOW ENERGY now~
and need to take a rest for a while~
wish everybody:GOOD NITE^^

MUET exam~

today : SATURDAY~
today morning wakeup early to prepare going to skul to sit for MUET exam~
i had using normal mood to face this exam~
and try to make myself to break away all the nervousness~
but,this morning someone make me more and more nervous when wanna going to skul~
and finally,i succeed to convinced myself to be stressful and nervous~
and i had done it well~

reached at skul~
mostly friends were at school canteen for waiting enter to the school hall~
all of us sure will do the last minutes revision~
actually,we were nth for us to study and revise~
we know that the preparation should be done since a long time ago~

is the time entered the hall and sit for MUET exam~
first paper~PAPER 3 READING~
this time MUET exam is easier than end year of the 2010~
because at least i still can understand what is talking about the passage~
hopefully,it will be helpful in my marks~
i try very hard in that~

the next paper~
PAPER4 WRITING~
the essay question:the most valuable thing in life is friendship~do you agree?discuss
when i get such question,can be consider HAPPY~
friendship?what is friendship?
and i'm started to think about it~
in this paper,i also try my best to write it out~
hopefully,can be high marks than lasttime~

the last paper~
PAPER 1 LISTENING~
oh my god~
really the most worst thing happen in this morning~
i could not heard clearly about what the speaker was said~
a bit DOWN and SAD~
45 marks~dunnoe can get more than 10 marks or not~
no mood to say about it again~

in the end,i can conclude that I HATE LISTENING so much!!!

after exam was finished,we were backed to our home~
and i have take a long nap(sleeping) in the whole evening~
it's too tired for me everytime when i was finished my exam or test~

BAND 3 BAND 3 BAND 3!!!!

BABY SING Friday's life

today : friday~
i was waked up early in the morning~
because wanna sent my father to airport~
he wants went to KL for attending his company dinner at tonite~
so,as a responsible daughter,i should sent him to airport~

19 years old~
i dint enter the airport even in my hometown's airport~
me can be consider "katak di bawah tempurung" or not?
DUNNOE^^

the new airport at AS~
just first time went~
felt so excited about it^^
inside the airport,really wide~
and i took photo at thr too~

after saw my father check in~
me and my mum also went bck~
we go n enjoyed our breakfast~

evening~
tuiton time~
tuiton whole evening~
this is my friday life~

after economic tuiton,i stayed back and want asking some question~
many questions that we dunnoe~
we should ask it,because we paying money for him to teach us~
before bck,the teacher praised us very hardworking~
he say:"kamu sangat rajin,mesti boleh dapat As"
at that time,i want to answer him:cikgu,kalau boleh,siapa tak mau?
but,i dint do that~

8.36pm now~
tomorrow still need to sit for MUET exam~
and i'm so nervous now~
what should i do for this last minutes?
i think,just can studying non stop~
although i know that it is too late and useless~
but at least i can try to remember some vocabulary before exam~
ADD OIL^^BABY SING
u can do it very well~~

MUET exam~is coming soon!

in coming SATURDAY~
i have to sit for MUET exam~
and this exam make me nervous and stress~

since primary school~
my english level can be consider very worse~
i dint have basic english about it~
but,i'll try to read a lot of books to improve my english proficiency~
and i also try and reading newspaper~
just hope it will correct my grammar and sentences and also learnt a lot of vocabulary~

i had an experience about the MUET exam~
but,it still very nervous for me to sit the exam~
TWICE~i had take the MUET exam twice~
i dont wan retake anymore~
i dont wan BAND 2 anymore~

thatday speaking test~
althought i got said it~
but,the nervour feeling make me dint have any good idea for me to present~
i'm lack of idea about my title at that time~
actually,SPORT is really got many things can say it~
but,i din do it very well~
FATED^^

MUET MUET MUET~
why i will nervous because of you?
i hate YOU~

3.67~SUCESSFUL

i had get back all my april monthly test result~
and i was calculated~
the pointer that i get in this time exam is 3.67~
2A 1A- and 1B~

today,i just get back my micro exam paper~
just 74% only~
felt a bit disappointed and sad~
because what i expect was failed~
i thought that i will get over 80%~
but,it's not!
teacher asked me and told me many thing~
she was curious i will choosed the essay that i dunnoe~
but,all of these is FATED~

luckily~
got marco paper helped me a lot~
and for economic paper~
i get 83 marks~gred A~
i should be satisfy~
i should be happy~
the result that i get back is fated~
and wont change anymore~

3.67~
compare with februari test~
my pointer wan drop 0.08~
but februari test seem nothing~
this is because we got our homework bonus marks add into the february test~
so,is nothing~

this saturday~
have MUET reading,writing and listening paper~
hope that i will do it very well~
just band 3 only~
god,pls gv me~i dont wan to retake again~
i dont want concentrate on MUET again~
BAND 3,I FIGHT WITH U~

promise to myself:HARDWORKING

april test was passed~
and the result is almost getting know it~
but,the marks is not so satisfied with it~
the result of april test,make me think that~
i'm almost wanna be a loser in a day~
maybe these test is just simple question~
because it is just exam a part only~
so,we just concentrete on it~
and the question is too straight away~
such as PP1~
but,the marks that i'm not satisfied~
92%~
maybe,it is a very good result for someone~
but,for me,not enough~
my friends all get the higher marks than me~
the feeling let me know that~
i will be loser in a day~

but luckily,finally my PP oso get gred A~
84 marks~
but is quiet ok only for me~
because this is just a test~
i already cant do it well~
no need to mention mid year exam~

i just scare my result will drop~
too many things that i learned~
too many things need to remember~
too many things need to pratice~
because [PRATICE MAKE PEFECT]~

today,i get back my marco marks~
31 per 34~
i should be happy,right?
but i dint~Y??
does my expectation is too higher?
or my mood still in sadness condition?
i DUNNOE~

but the marco marks make me realize that~
i cant be lazy anymore~
i must study always~
i must do more exercise~
i must study hard for my in coming exam~
i cant be loser anymore~
i hate the feeling~
I WANT BE THE BEST~

so,i promise to myself~
BABY SING,HARDWORKING~
mid year exam pointer:3.80 above!!
ADD OIL together^^
my friends~

fantastic tuesday's life^^

AGAIN~
tuesday life is the most busier day in my life~
today,we still need to stay at skul after skul time for our cocuriculum~

we decided went out to had a lunch after school time~
we decided went to KFC to enjoy our lunch~
almost thirteen of us~three cars went to KFC~
with the same uniform~
we ordered our lunch and sat down eating~
we were enjoyed our lunch so much~

our camera girl~WINNIE~
was busy took photo when we r eating~
thx for her so much~
she was took many photos~
it's can be our memories~
i like it~

we were took so many cuties photos~
and we decided upload it and become profile picture in facebook~
alomost 3pm like that~
we r back to our skul~
at class~
nothing can i do~
it is wasted my time~
luckily my best friend brought netbook to skul today~
and we enjoyed the MV of korea song~
like it too^^

and today's feeling~
can consider SAD ~
something always happened around me~
and i'm too care of my surrounding~
i'm felt too stress and suffer~
as a friend,we cannot chatting together or stting together?
i really cant understand it~
really CANT~

maybe,all of these,the most factor is MY PROBLEM~

hopefully,BABY SING can really be HAPPY GIRL in one day~
i'm waiting the day coming!!
seriously~~

lastly,wish my friend~
HAPPY BIRTHDAY~SWEET 19~
and we were celebrated his birthday in class too~
and took so many photos~
the birthday cake look so beautiful and delicious~
it will makes me become fatty again after eating the cake~
but,i cant control myself~
i will blame myself if i din eating it~
so,very SORRY to myself~
BABY SING,SORRY^^

我~没资格！

答应你的~
我还是没有做到~
我知道你很不开心，很难过~
我对你的承诺，我还是没有做到~
对不起~对不起~
就算再多的对不起，也是没有用了~
对吗？


我多么地不开心~
我多么地失望~
我多么地难过~


我答应你的，我做不到！


你知道吗？
你知道为什么在班上我那么少跟你说话吗？
你知道为什么你要求我坐跟你时，我拒绝吗？
因为~
我不喜欢班上同学的闲言闲语~
我不喜欢同学在我们背后说我们~
我不喜欢被自己的好友说[重色轻友]~
我不喜欢那种感觉~


我要~
我们在一起时是多么地没烦恼~
我们坐在一起谈天是那么轻松~
我们不会被人家说这和那~


所以，每当在班~
我都会很犹豫~
要跟你谈天还是不要？
我每次都在想~


这件事，总是让我的心情改变了~
我不是我了~
我太依赖你了~
也许是，我太在乎你了~


爱你，我没资格吧！
总是让你那么不开心~
我没资格，真的没资格了！

BABY SING's sunday life~

TODAY:sunday~
and my sunday life will be the same almost every week~
early in the morning,wake up early for going to skul~
evening,going again to skul for ping pong pratice~
actually,my life become meaningful and meaningless~
why i will say it?
MEANINGFUL mean i spent all the time on my studies and sports~
MEANINGLESS mean repeating doing the same thing in every week~
so,what should i say?
this is my life~

PING PONG PRATICE~
same as lasttime~
our pingpong techique still very worst~
for us ,PING PONG=BADMINTON~
we can SMACH ppl by easily withouht any rules~
we can shoot ppl without any minus marks~
i'm enjoyed it very much~
it also improve my skills so much~
i just realize that~
I LOVE PINGPONG~

wish BABY SING:goodnite^^

now the clock showing the time:12.46am~
and i'm just finish doing my homework~
many homeworks especially tuiton homeworks cant finish~
and want to say:SORRY,TEACHER!
i cant pass up my homework at the time~
hopefully u can forgive me~

12.46am~
i believe that all my friends are sleeping in their bed~
but i'm still sitting in front of laptop~
on9 and writing blog non stop~

tomorrow is school day again~
why do i go to skul actually?
teachers always dint enter the class~
and our study life just full of chating and gambling~
our class almost become CASINO~
but we believe that these is just an entertainment for us~

just passed the april monthly test~
it's mean that mid year exam is coming soon~
all teachers always remind us about the exam~
make we feel nervous now~

STUDY actually is for what?
get knowledge?or just for exam?
my brain now is full of question mark~

and i just realize that~
want to achieve my target is the most hardness thing~
the most thing that i had learned~
make me loss my confidence~
but,i will try my best to do it~
4 FLAT,i fight with u~

finally,wish BABYSING:good nite~have a nice dream~

more and more~

i'm a GREEDY person~
many thing that i want is uncountable~
as a human,our needed is unlimited~
we cannot deny it~

just like ME~
i want many LOVE from my friends,families and classmates~
i want they alway together with me~
i want they alway chating wif me,instead of leaving me alone~
i want they alway care about me~
i want they alway missing me~
but,do they did it?
i'm thinking it^^

at the same time~
actually i can be consider lucky person in this world~
all the things that happened around me~
can be well and lucky~
all the problems that happened to me~
i can handle it very well~

i have many friends too in my life~
i have my family support~
i have the gang of BEST FRIENDS~
my life can consider full of fun,joke and meaningful~
so,what thing do i unsatified again?
ENOUGH,BABY SING~
u have a lot of things beside u~
please appreciate it^^

我们的友谊能持续吗？

你还是决定了放弃~
我很开心，因为证明了我们之间还是有朋友关系可以持续~
那天，你在面子书再次确定问我是否你应该放弃~
而我的答案，终究还是一个：是的~
我也告诉你：不要让我们没有朋友可以做的地步~
你最后也告诉我：那好的，我放弃吧！
谢谢你，谢谢你给我们一条生路~
爱情，一直都是那样~
[爱或不爱]
[喜欢或不喜欢]
这一切都不能勉强~

今天补习，看到你~
说真的，很尴尬~
不懂要给你什么表情~
微笑？若无其事？
我不知道！！

不过，过后还好了~
我们还是能像以前那样疯狂地说话~
还在讽刺班长~
讽刺他传错信息给我~
我很开心，因为我们还是继续我们的友谊~

就让我们回到原点吧~
就让我们回到最当初的我们~

EMO SING~就是我！

很多事情困扰了我~
就连我自己，也无法说出口~
我觉得自己很没用~
总是为了一点点的小事影响了自己~
我~自责！
我~伤心！

学校的一个星期小考~
我虽然有读书，但还是觉得问题很难~
是我开始退步了吗？
还是我的心结没打开呢？
我不知道~

我觉得自己很累了~
我觉得我好像为了别人而活~
我觉得我生活好像太依赖一个人了~
我变得不像我了~

我充满了嫉妒~
我充满了不悦~

以前那每天开开心心去学校的温欣呢？
到了哪里去？
现在在学校的温欣究竟为了什么而伤心呢？

朋友的[讽刺]对我来说~
多么地痛，多么地不开心~
朋友说我：心太软了！
这点，我承认了~
因为，我只想保持回当初那些纯粹的友谊~~

我告诉朋友~
是因为我想听听你们的意见~
而不是得到你们的讽刺~
可能是我自己太敏感了吧~
也许朋友们都不是这样的意思~

他，总是让我脑海出现很多的疑问~
他到底真的喜欢我吗？
我对他来说到底又算什么？
我不知道~
虽然我们是很好，可是有时，我不知道他要的是什么~
他要的，我不知道我给不给得到~

我想放弃了~
我想放下了~
可是我做不到！

怎么办呢？
时间吗？需要时间吗？
我想做回HAPPY SING~~

不幸的事~

几乎有一个星期了~
部落还是没有更新~
其实，这几天我都很少上网了~
有也是一下子而已~

开学起~
学校要我们全部人星期二和三都必须留在学校到5点~
说什么课外活动~
根本就是多余的嘛~
浪费我们的时间，睡眠时间~

星期三（23/3/2011）
这天是第一次留在学校~
很多朋友都回家去~
就惟有我们几个笨蛋~
呆在学校不愿回去~

原本打算好，放学就在学校食堂吃吃就好~
那知道，去学校食堂逛了一趟~
觉得自己好像被骗被骗那样~
就决定绕学校走走看看~
看自己是否真的被骗了呢~

随后，朋友走来，约我们一起出去出东西~
我们当然说好咯~
就这样，我们就出去了~
一路上，我们都说说笑笑~
还说因为我在车，全部人都要EMO~
我就说我开车时不喜欢有人在我旁边说个不停~
这样会让我分神~

到了ASMA学校附近~
突然一辆摩托突然没有看好就冲出来~
朋友也来不及煞车~
就这样，撞到了他~
可是幸好人没事~
不然，我们就大事了~
最大事的还是我的朋友呢~

朋友下车帮他捡东西起来~
他还笑笑地跟朋友说了几句~
大概是因为他也觉得他错了~
不好意思跟我们吧~

那种情形，那种撞法~
还是依然浮现在我的脑海里~
时不时就会想起~
而且，画面很清楚~
我很怕，真的很怕！

我在想：如果司机是我，那我该怎么办？
突然觉得我那个朋友很勇敢~
真的很勇敢~

当然，朋友也不好受~
自己撞人了~
车也有点损坏~
不过，幸好朋友爸爸没有责怪朋友~
不然，我会更过意不去~
朋友一番好意载我们出去吃东西~
但，却在途中撞到了那活该被撞的摩托~

所以，我想拜托那摩托司机~
你要死，就不要害人~
你要死，就死远点吧~

接下来，午餐当然没有心情吃了~
因为那种画面，那种感觉还是很恐怖~
我也看得出朋友的烦恼~

我想这天，是很不祥的日子！
天空也为我们悲哀了起来~
为我们下了一场这天的大雨~
谢谢你，老天！
谢谢你的眼泪！！

学校开学咯~

学校终于开学了~
一个星期的假期~
对我来说，没有用~
在家的时间除了吃，就是上网~
虽然已经减少上网的时间了，可是偶尔还是会经不起考验~
我就是那么不坚定~
所以，朋友总是说我~
对一件事情，抱着3分钟的态度而已~
这点，我承认了！！

昨晚，追台湾偶像剧到凌晨1点多~
一边哭着一边看~
而且，几乎从头哭到尾~
大结局真的令人哭泣不已~
女主角总是努力挽回那段感情~
但，男主角却要因为家庭企业要离开~
经过很多的事情后，他们还是在一起了~
台湾偶像剧就是那样~
但，人的现实生活中，总是不会那么美好幸福的~

今天早上，妈妈叫了很多次才醒来~
而且还是在睡眠中去冲凉~准备一切~
在班上，打瞌睡的次数肯定不可少的~
而且老师每个说话都好像安眠药~
弄得我和好友都打起瞌睡来了~
老师，你好料！！
老师，I C U UP ~

下午回到家~
做好一切东西后~
3.30PM了，就小睡一下子~
4.00PM，被惊醒了~
要去学校PING PONG练习~
很不甘愿地起床~

今天的PINGPONG练习很少人~
大概是因为今天下午天气不好吧~
很多人都缺席了~
而我，也发现到，我的技术越来越好了~

今天，在班上~
无意间，加入了三位朋友的聊天空间~
他们的对话，觉得他们之间存有很大的GAP~
让我想到PP老师说的~
人与人之间，不会心心相印~

放下“从前的一切”

说声：再见，假期！
说声：保重，假期！
学校一个星期的假期，拜拜~~

在家的一个星期~
反而让自己变了更懒惰~更不用功~
经常往图书馆去，希望自己能找回那读书的感觉~
**********************************************************************
前几晚，我很开心~
因为某事让我觉得：放下的心情~
星期四晚上，“从前的他”打了电话给我~
我们整整聊了1个小时的电话~
我们已经可以用普通朋友的语气来谈天了~
我终于可以面对“从前的他”了~
我们谈了很多很多的东西~
“从前的他”关心我的学业~
不过，我很清楚，那是朋友的问候~

现在，对“从前的他”的感觉~
我可以很肯定地说~
[我不爱他了]~
我也可以肯定地说~
[我终于放下了]~
*****************************************************************
星期五~是补习天~
从中午补到傍晚~
每个星期都是那样，我早已习惯了~

PP老师还是一样~
总是说着那些大道理~
总是说着一些还有意义的笑话~
**********************************************************************
一个多年的朋友兼同班同学~
让我烦恼了好久~
很多事情，我不希望让自己伤害你~
很多的东西，我不希望说地太明显~
我希望你自己可以明白~
但，你却不明白~
逼得我一次又一次地伤害你~
这样的伤害，是你想要的吗？

其实，我多么想保持回以前那种感觉~
纯粹的“友谊感觉”~
但，你能做到吗？
我不希望我们因为这样的事情~
弄得你我都变了尴尬~

今天，我告诉了你~
[如果你觉得我回你的信息是给你希望的话，我下次不会再回你了]~
而你却还是问了我~
[难道你对我一点感觉都没有吗？还是你比较喜欢“他”呢？]~
我还是回答了你~
[对阿，一点感觉都没有，我早就叫你放弃了，我们是不可能的]~
过了一阵子，你还是传来了~
你说~
[你想清楚了，你决定让我们变回从前，变回朋友]~
你知道吗？当我看到这封信息后，我真的很开心~
这就是我要的结局~
谢谢你，让我把烦恼消除了~
而我以后，不必烦恼要以什么心情去面对同班的你~

感情，本来就是自私的~
我终于领悟了！！

*********************************************************************
觉得自己还是很多东西都搞不清楚哦~
我一定要好好读书~
我不可以让自己后悔的~
我要打败很多人~
我要让自己觉得我是可以的~

用功~是我现在最想做的事情~
**********************************************************************

运动会2011~

多天的彩排~
多天的辛苦~
终于运动会来到了~

被老师强迫去操步~
为自己队伍付出力量~
其实，我都是被逼的~

最可怜还是好友~
她，真的是[为队牺牲]啊~
穿了不知道什么衣服的服装~
还被取笑为[蒙古阿里山的姑娘]~

而我呢，却要变成马来婆~
其实，我的还好啦~
穿起来，看起来，也蛮不错的嘛~

我们每个人都嗮的变成了黑人~
真的可怜啊~
不过，这也是我生平第一次~
在运动会场上，付出过力量~
我，应该为自己掌声鼓励~

当天的照片~
我和好友的SAMPAT照片~

**************************************************************************
当天的心情~
那天的心情~
不懂应该怎么形容~
难过吗？不懂！
开心吗？没有！
伤心呢？不清楚！

我只知道，多种的事情让我觉得心情很复杂~

我想了很久很久~
也许，放下对我来说是好的吧~
我不想再去猜测你现在什么心情~
我不想再去怀疑你对我的感情了~
我更不想去猜测你对我许过的诺言~
我觉得我很累很累了~

朋友一定很不了解我~
她们一定会猜想为什么我要那么做~
我只想让自己更开心~
我想让自己回到那些没有烦恼的生活里~
难道，我又错了吗？
我知道你们会支持我的决定的！！
 
对我而言，眼前的学业是最重要的！
我能做到吗？

******************************************************************************